Google Will Save Your Relationship
Clearly, women strip because men lie. And we cross our legs because of your endless barrage of morning wood.
Holy Balls, Batman. [NSFW]
And now, for something relatively inappropriate. Feel free to insert (heh) your own "hung like this" joke. (via.)
Your Mom Slept With The Pizza Guy
Banging the delivery driver in homage to your favorite '80s porno? Acceptable.
6 Geeky Beers That I Must Get Drunk On
Because there ain't no party like a nerdcore party.
Vampire Attacks Helpless Geriatric
A 22-year-old transient attacked an elderly, wheelchair-bound man in a Hooters parking lot in Florida yesterday, telling him "I am a vampire, I am going to eat you," before ripping bite-sized chunks out of his face and arm. The Smoking Gun reports that when questioned by the police, "she was unable to tell officers what had transpired outside the shuttered restaurant. Nor could she explain what had happened to her pants or why her panties were at her ankles." I'm going to point the finger of blame at Stephanie Meyer. This kind of shit never went down when Anne Rice was around.
Subterranean Love Shack Found In Tripoli
The new president of Tripoli's Fateh University has discovered a hidden complex underneath the Green Theatre. I'm not saying that things of a rape-y nature have occurred there. But a set of underground rooms that include a bedroom, jacuzzi, and fully equipped gynecological operating theatre? Don't mind the Marvin Gaye in the background. Just tell me if this rag smells like chloroform.
How To Avoid Being Eaten By A Grue
Seriously. That Grue looks hungry. And that drunk chick looks pretty receptive.
10 Movie Scenes That Will Make You Cringe [NSFW]
Do not click if you are pregnant, nursing, or have a history of heart problems. I've thoughtfully included YouTube links to the scenes I could find. Buy a fifth of whiskey before you watch them.
Brother and Sister Have Sex In Elevator
These two already look like the products of incest. It must run in the family? My favorite part of the article: But she denied she'd had sex for cash — while Richard said he gave her the £20 "as a brother, not for payment".
Obama and McCain Exposed
I wasn't aware that McCain had so much junk in the trunk. Or that he looked better in a corset than I do.
Christian Casual Encounters
Jesus might have taken three days to rise again, but you shouldn't have to wait that long.
Corgi Puppies Discover Grass
So cute that it's practically nauseating. There's a special surprise at the 1:30 mark.
Fire Ball Fight
How do residents of Nejapa celebrate the anniversary of a village-destroying volcano? By throwing flaming, gasoline soaked rags at each others' legs. ¡VIVA EL SALVADOR!
The Most Disturbing Male Swimsuit You'll Ever See [NSFW; Do Not Click]
You really shouldn't look at this. If you need me, I'll be over here drinking grain alcohol in an attempt to unsee that.
Welcome To Frosh Week In Montreal
Oh, Canada. I'm suitably impressed by the green Jockeys. My morning commutes will now seem boring by comparison.
A Bibliophile's Wet Dream
I may have popped a literary boner for this concept. Olivier Charles created this digital rendering for an International Competition of Architecture for the Stockholm Public Library.
Ewok Playing An Acoustic Guitar
More like eROCK, amirite? …I apologize for that.