Harvard's Closed Captioning Malfunctioned And Turned Zuckerberg's Speech Into A Jibberish Tone Poem

"CECEOKOK wasn't the first thing I built" —Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg

Today, Harvard's closed-captioning system apparently malfunctioned — just as Mark Zuckerberg was giving his commencement speech at the university.

And it ruled.

Like any good commencement speech, there were important career lessons for the graduates.

This perfectly sums up Zuck’s speech

And wise words to look deep within oneself.

As well as the poignant reminder that, when things don't go your way, you should dust yourself off and never FEELINGORRYOROR yourself.

.@melaniehannah found the best thing in the world: insanely bad closed captioning of Zuck's commencement address on… https://t.co/e7vyy2l9kX

Zuck even took his own advice to bare one's soul, and opened up about his past.

Learning a lot about Mark Zuckerberg from Facebook’s automatic speech captions. Anyone got a CECEOKOK login that st… https://t.co/FViu4aMUdE

For the soon-to-be graduates in attendance, the pelting rain was a reminder of the cold, uncertain world they'd soon enter.

it is raining here and everyone isnmiserable

But fear not. Zuckerberg's words were a balm for their restless souls.

Facebook’s auto-caption function is… not great

And a pledge not only to find the void within, but also to turn it into a 3-star hotel.

Love staying at the Voidd Inn when I’m in town

Zuckerberg's message was the story of the everyman and everywoman. Hard truths that bristled among the woolen suit–clad robber barons in attendance.

We now go live to Mark Zuckerberg addressing the passengers of the titanic

They may not have liked the message provided by Harvard's closed-captioning algorithms, but there was little they could do.

The woman behind Zuck looks like she is straight up falling asleep and I love it.

The algorithm, you see, is always right.

lol this is the opposite of what he said


This story and headline has been updated to note it was Harvard's closed captioning that malfunctioned, not Facebook's.

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