Sarah Burton
What Are You Running From?
The question every runner must answer before they lace up those sneaks.
Sarah Burton
This Choreography To Rihanna's "Bitch Better Have My Money" Transcends All
I've watched this at least 30 times.
Sarah Burton
IDGAF What You Say, Time Warner Cable Customer Service Is The Shit
This cable company is the shit!
Sarah Burton
31 Animals Crashing Professional Sports Like Champions
Put me in, coach.
Sarah Burton
How Did Kanye Impregnate Kim Kardashian?
"I’ma disrobe you, then I’ma probe you."
Sarah Burton
11 Best Media Hoaxes Of All Time
You just got hoaxed, fool.
Sarah Burton
Yes Or No: Porn Stars Should Have To Wear Goggles To Protect Against Flying Splooge
California is considering requiring adult film actors to wear eye protection during certain sex scenes.
Sarah Burton
Is The Granny Panty The New Thong?
The New York Times is reporting that for young snake people, thongs are out, and granny panties are in. DAT TRUE?
Sarah Burton
Can You Define These Spelling Bee Winning Words?
Eighth graders could spell these words. But WTF do they mean?
Sarah Burton
Hypothetical Tag Lines For Bernie Sanders Spray Deodorant
“You don’t necessarily need a choice of 23 underarm spray deodorants..." when you can have one! Introducing Bernie Sanders Spray Deodorant.
Sarah Burton
Which Porn Site Should You Use?
Quite possibly the most important quiz of our time.
Sarah Burton
Gentleman’s Guide To Fraternity Life Based On Events That Actually Happened This Past Year
What can we learn from our brothers' most recent transgressions? We've simplified these lessons into a simple guide of do's and don'ts.
Sarah Burton
17 Most Sexually Explicit Stock Photos...
...of animals having sex.
Sarah Burton
What If North Korea Used My Idol To Fake The Next Round Of Propaganda
I imagine Kim Jong Un's propagandists are just getting super lazy.
Sarah Burton
Tinder Tips For Fleet Week Sailors Who Will Most Assuredly Get Laid
Three simple steps for building the perfect Fleet Week profile.
Sarah Burton
David Letterman Was A Weatherman Before Late Night And Other Facts
He was a weatherman, sports reporter, game show host, and just overall awesome dude.
Sarah Burton
If Women Must Wear Heels At Cannes, Why Not Wear Heelys?
Heelys: technically heels, but fundamentally flats.
Sarah Burton
This Newborn Baby Gorilla Will Make You Miss Your Mommy
A baby gorilla was just born in Australia. Here are the first pictures of the yet-to-be-named baby.
Sarah Burton
Should Texas Governor Greg Abbot Be Banned From Banning The Ban That Bans Fracking?
FYI: The results of this poll will not actually ban Texas governor Greg Abbott from banning the local bans on fracking.
Sarah Burton
What I Think Is Happening In Taylor Swift's New Music Video For Bad Blood
Taylor's Swift new music video is awesome enough to be a movie. But what exactly is going on? Indulge me while I fantasize.
Sarah Burton
