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21 Signs We Should Give Up On Robots

Well, we tried.

Posted on May 25, 2012, at 11:12 a.m. ET

1. The Spatula Robot

Clearly we're no longer worried about functionality.

Clearly we're no longer worried about functionality.

2. The Singing Christmas Sweater Robot

If you go home tonight and this is in your house, run.

3. The Robotic Dental Patient

The eyes!

4. The Robotic Skeleton Torso


This is the most horrifying thing I have ever seen.


5. The Robots of Chuck E. Cheese

True story: These horrible creatures made me cry when I was three years old. I cannot believe they are allowed around children.

6. The Writhing Baby Skeleton

Oh wait, no, this is the most horrifying thing I have ever seen.

7. The Disembodied Mouth

It's trying to say, "kill me."

8. The Bodyless Cat


It's coming for you.


9. The Robotic Butt

It just gets spanked by Japanese scientists all day, every day.

10. The Standup Comedy Robot

In particular, we should give up on robots doing standup.

11. The Gray Child Robot

His powers include kicking his legs, barking, and exhibiting distress.

12. The Crawling Elderly Businessman Robot

This is actually a performance art piece about how robots are horrifying.


13. The Big Dog

This one just walks endlessly through the wilderness. Occasionally his creator tries to kick him over.

...and the strangely faithful parody.

14. The Robot Clone

This guy was made in the likeness of Russia 2045 founder Dmitry Itskov. It's only a matter of time before it kills him in a fit of vengeance.

15. The Uncle Sam Robot

Not technologically sophisticated, but its capacity for rage is endless.


16. The Disembodied Hands

Despite the song, these hands are not happy and cannot know it.

17. The Twitchy Robot Clown


Watch out for the tongue.

18. The Robot Bartender

Master Blaster, anyone?

19. The Armless Legless Robot

I assume this was punishment for something.

20. The Robot Beatles


The entire premise of this is just mortifying.

21. The Dog-Baby Robot

It has no mouth, but it must scream.