This Dog Walker Makes Up Stories And Personalities For His Dogs And Sends Them To His Girlfriend

"Elsie: gets emotionally attached, doesn't like being called a 'wiener dog.'"

This is Jordan Clark and his girlfriend Amelia Capaz. Clark has been a full-time "dog walker extraordinaire" in Brooklyn for a year and a half. He walks about 10 to 11 dogs a day.

Jordan Clark

His favorite perk of the job is he "can fart whenever I want to — dogs don’t care," he said.

Clark said he often gets bored on the job, so he'll send Capaz photos and updates of the puppers he walks daily.

Jordan Clark

Capaz told BuzzFeed News her personal favorite is her kindred spirit pup, a gray French bulldog named Bowie.

"He gets a lot of time to use his phone during the day and he's super creative," Capaz said about her boyfriend. One day out of the blue, he started sending her very descriptive narratives and personality traits of the dogs. Here's Bowie's:

Amelia Capaz

Capaz has been getting new dog descriptions, and updates, nearly every day since, she said.

Amelia Clark

The personalities are pretty arbitrary, Clark admits, but he does enjoy watching them every day and being reminded of actual people and their caricatures.

Amelia Capaz

"Jacob is my favorite and reminds me of an ambitious dude who wants to be the best but isn’t quite there yet."

Amelia Capaz

"Sherman is that kid that wants to be cool but still pisses the bed. I was also that kid."

Amelia Capaz

To play fair, Clark even made one for himself. "Needless to say I'm always entertained," Capaz said.

Amelia Capaz

Clark has not yet told any of the dogs' owners about this little venture, but they of course will soon find out.

If you are an owner of any of these featured doggos, please comment below and confirm, debunk, or add to any of the listed personality traits. It's important. It's journalism.



A BuzzFeed News investigation, in partnership with the International Consortium of Investigative Journalists, based on thousands of documents the government didn't want you to see.