The Royals Had Another Baby And The World's Media Lost Their Shit

    Yes, a TV show in the UK correctly predicted the gender of the baby by cutting a banana.

    As the news broke that the Duchess of Cambridge had gone into labour this morning, the world's media took the emergency axe to the glass marked "royal baby".

    Straight out the gate, the Press Association speculated about just how fast Catherine could push out the little tyke. Apparently, many mothers report "a speedier delivery third time around".

    PA making a strong early showing in the royal baby news-that-isn’t-news stakes

    @adamblenford / Twitter

    Meanwhile, the Irish Independent were asking the big questions.

    @FlippinKath / Twitter

    On the ground, an unsuspecting couple emerged from the same hospital where the royal baby was being delivered and were met with hundreds of reporters and cameras pointed right at them.

    Unsuspecting couple have new baby - and find the world’s press waiting outside.

    @JamesAALongman / Twitter

    It then got even weirder. ITV's This Morning did a feature where they cut up a so-called psychic banana to work out whether the baby was going to be a boy or a girl.

    It's hour four of #royalbaby watch and This Morning has done a segment where they guess the sex of the baby through a psychic banana and this is all perfectly normal https://t.co/CNoHgxSLv0

    @scottygb / Twitter

    Just to reiterate: Yes, this was a moment of British television. Yes, this actually really happened.

    Amazingly, it got weirder as the banana was right.

    @scottygb / Twitter


    Meanwhile, the US's CBS This Morning (different show, this one did not feature a banana) came back from an ad break with footage of a town crier, which it claimed was "the official proclamation" outside the hospital.

    CBS News deleted its "official royal baby proclamation" tweet but you can't delete live TV

    @matthewchampion / Twitter

    "How about that for a birth announcement?" CBS anchor Norah O'Donnell said in the video, which has since been deleted from Twitter. "That’s the way they do it there."

    Unfortunately it's not. Not even close.

    Over on Sky News, a midwife outside the hospital was left to question whether the duchess would breastfeed her new baby: “It’s the usual challenges of getting it started…at least she’ll have lots of help."

    The Mirror said the new baby boy is the "heaviest future king in over a century" despite the new arrival to the royal family being the FIFTH in line and highly unlikely to ever become king.

    Royal baby is heaviest future king 'in over a century' https://t.co/lnbIKjZxGO

    @MirrorRoyal / Twitter

    By late afternoon at Reuters, the tiniest of developments in the rolling breaking news story were still being blasted out to the world.

    Reuters breaks stories like no other outfit.

    @hendopolis / Twitter

    This is what happens when the media have no new information for hours and hours on end.

    A CNN presenter has suggested the new royal baby should be called Severus Albus Windsor, after Harry Potter’s son.

    @benrileysmith / Twitter

    You might have also remember the BBC's news anchor Simon McCoy, who drily delivered the news that Kate was pregnant last year, ending with the payoff: "Get the time off, because that's what I'm doing.

    This BBC Breaking News alert where @BBCSimonMcCoy announces when Kate Middleton is having her birthday is PEAK SIMON MCCOY https://t.co/GKb4nQOp7J

    @scottygb / Twitter

    Well, today he was working.

    But sadly he was not at the Lindo Wing.

    @BBCSimonMcCoy / Twitter

    Whilst talking to a reporter who was waiting outside the Lindo Wing, he said, "Sorry that I couldn't be with you."


    Finally, a special mention to the Independent, who celebrated this breaking royal news on their Twitter feed...

    ...but then not long later shared the headline "woman gives birth to baby boy", attempting to mock the over-the-top royal coverage everybody else was doing.

    Note: The Independent has published seven different articles on the royal baby today.