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Beyoncé Said “I Will Never Push Myself That Far Again” In Her Netflix Documentary About Her 2018 Coachella Performance

“I definitely pushed myself further than I knew I could and I learned a very valuable lesson: I will never never push myself that far again,” Beyoncé said.

Posted on April 17, 2019, at 4:45 p.m. ET

Courtesy Of Parkwood Entertainment / Netflix

In Beyoncé’s new Netflix documentary Homecoming, the singer opened up about her pregnancy struggles and hardships balancing motherhood and her career, saying she pushed herself "further than I knew I could."

"And I learned a very valuable lesson: I will never never push myself that far again," Beyoncé said.

According to Beyoncé, she was supposed to perform at Coachella in 2017, but unexpectedly got pregnant with twins, "which was even more of a surprise."

“Just trying to figure out how to balance being the mother of a 6-year-old, of twins that need me, and giving myself creatively and physically, it was a lot to juggle,” Beyoncé said.


Beyoncé and her husband, Jay Z, expanded their family in June 2017 with the birth of twins Sir and Rumi Carter. The documentary, which gives fans a behind-the-scenes look at her iconic 2018 Coachella performance, revealed that Bey had a difficult pregnancy with her twins, and dealt with both toxemia and preeclampsia, a condition related to high blood pressure. Beyoncé also said that she had to have an emergency C-section because one of the babies’ heartbeats “paused a few times.”

On the day she gave birth to Sir and Rumi, Beyoncé said she was 218 pounds.

“My body went through more than I knew it could,” she added.

Coachella 2018 was Beyoncé’s return to singing and performing after having her twins, and she said it was not easy to “rebuild” her body and feel comfortable incorporating pieces of her personality into the routine. She said her diet was also intense: She gave up carbs, sugar, dairy, fish, meat, and alcohol.


“It’s my first time back home on the stage after giving birth. I’m creating my own homecoming and it’s hard,” she said. “There were days that I thought I’d never be the same, I’d never be the same physically, my strength and endurance would never be the same.”

Between taking care of her newborns and raising now 7-year-old daughter Blue Ivy, Beyoncé rehearsed for eight months prior to performing at Coachella.

“In the beginning, it was so many muscle spasms and just internally my body was not connected. My mind was not there,” she said. “My mind wanted to be with my children. What people don’t see is the sacrifice. I would dance and go off to the trailer and breastfeed the babies, and the days I could, I would bring the children.”

Courtesy Of Parkwood Entertainment / Netflix

Ultimately, Beyoncé pulled off her goal and delivered one of the most memorable Coachella performances of all time.

“I feel like I’m just a new woman in a new chapter of my life,” she said. “I’m not even trying to be who I was, it’s so beautiful that children do that to you.”

A BuzzFeed News investigation, in partnership with the International Consortium of Investigative Journalists, based on thousands of documents the government didn't want you to see.