30 Tweets About Science That Will Make You Laugh And Then Think

"Why don't we tell the people that every snowflake is unique? It's not like they'll ever really check." "Let's do it"

1.

I'm just sayin', everyone that confuses correlation with causation eventually ends up dead.

2.

"um, Dr Schrodinger? I opened the box and, well... we may have a problem"

3.

Science is tricky. Keeps you on your toes. Mineralogy? Study of minerals. Oceanology? Study of oceans. Meteorology? NOT ABOUT METEORS.

4.

[Science Meeting, 1924] Why don't we tell the people that every snowflake is unique? It's not like they'll ever really check "Let's do it"

5.

Just an FYI: If you removed all veins, arteries, & capillaries from your body and laid them end to end, you will die.

6.

7.

You can make your VERY OWN MARS WATER on Earth: Just put ten drops of water on a pretzel and then suck on it while freezing to death.

8.

hey it's me, the girl who just googled "chemistry alphabet" when i meant "periodic table"

9.

Not to be reductionist but *literally is just a collection of quarks and electrons.*

10.

Simba, everything the light touches is our kingdom "wat abot that shadowy place. by 5pm it wil be in the sun" ..who told you about science

@jonnysun "does monarchal ownershibp depemd on time of day? also wat abot cloudy days. wat abot night" You can't go to school anymore Simba

11.

They don't seem to abduct humans like they used to; looks like we are not the only planet with government science-funding budget cuts. Sad.

12.

Plot idea: 97% of the world's scientists contrive an environmental crisis, but are exposed by a plucky band of billionaires & oil companies.

13.

*donates body to science* Science: I have a boyfriend.

14.

Today is Penguin Awareness Day. Penguins can be dealt with effectively if detected early. Go to your GP if you see symptoms.

15.

Someone please tell @SharkWeek what "Netflix and chill" is slang for... I can't bring myself to do it.

DON'T HAVE SEX WITH SHARKS, PEOPLE. I CANNOT STRESS THIS ENOUGH. https://t.co/cN6eQM88Bi

16.

I have deer like reflexes... "Don't you mean cat like?" [Hears a twig snapping in a nearby Bush] *just fucking bolts with incredible grace*

17.

"I'm only 3 if you round down" - humble pi

18.

These pentaquarks bring physicists to the yard and they're like we get a gold star damn right Pc(4450)+ and Pc(4380)+ both got five quarks

19.

I'm no scientist, but if that ebola virus is communicable, that means WE CAN TALK TO IT.

20.

🌓🌎🌞 <-- lunar eclipse 🌎🌓🌞 <-- solar eclipse 🌎🌞🌗 <-- apocalypse

21.

Me: nice car Friend: yeah 400 horsepower Me: that's like 7000 ducks Friend: what Me: what

22.

“Ants, ant behaviour, ant expert, why do ants do that, ant questions answered, best ants, buy ants cheap” - SEO Wilson

23.

Why do we believe in stupid evolutionary psychology just-so stories? Because our hunter-gather ancestors killed anyone who thought otherwise

24.

Alien: why should I not blow up this planet? Human: we are an advanced species A: how do you travel? H: we light old dinosaurs on fire

25.

What if global warming *is* a hoax and we clean up our air and oceans, create millions of jobs, and become energy independent for nothing?

26.

(scientists naming weird spiny thing in a bush) Scientist 1: This thing sucks Scientist 2: Yeah! S1: It's hogging all the hedges! S2: Wait.

27.

28.

We basically broke up with Pluto by saying it wasn't a planet anymore then spent 9yrs obsessing about it & just drove by its house real slow

29.

Scientist: But WHY is the bee population dying? Scientist: No idea. *eats bee* Scientist: Did you just eat a bee? Scientist: *eats bee* No.

30.

Scientists: Don't freak out about Ebola. Everyone: *Panic!* Scientists: Freak out about climate change. Everyone: LOL! Pass me some coal.

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