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19 Ways Donald Trump's First Foreign Trip Could Go Horribly, Terribly Wrong

A cautionary tale of things that probably won't happen. Maybe.

Posted on May 19, 2017, at 11:28 a.m. ET

A little under four months into his presidency, with chaos swirling around him at home, President Donald Trump sets off on his first foreign trip on Friday, a whirlwind five-country extravaganza.

He'll be accompanied by a retinue of aides as he visits Saudi Arabia to give a speech on Islam, Israel, and the Palestinian territories to try to kick-start a peace plan, the Vatican for...pope stuff, Brussels for a NATO summit, and Italy for a meeting of the Group of Seven.
Mandel Ngan / AFP / Getty Images

He'll be accompanied by a retinue of aides as he visits Saudi Arabia to give a speech on Islam, Israel, and the Palestinian territories to try to kick-start a peace plan, the Vatican for...pope stuff, Brussels for a NATO summit, and Italy for a meeting of the Group of Seven.

Any foreign trip can be fraught, but with this one so high-stakes and a president who himself is nervous, here's a look at some of the ways it could go sideways:

Jim Watson / AFP / Getty Images

1. Trump could forget his toothbrush in the residence and force the plane to turn around mid-flight.

Susan Walsh / AP, Duane Burleson / AP

2. A shot-by-shot remake of the Harrison Ford–Gary Oldman thriller Air Force One could break out.

View this video on YouTube

youtube.com

3. Son-in-law-cum-adviser Jared Kushner could spend the entire time they're in Saudi Arabia quoting Star Wars: Attack of the Clones.

LucasFilm

Ivanka would get the reference but ignore him pointedly. Senior adviser Stephen Miller would laugh every time, to everyone's regret.

4. The president could pronounce the "h" in "Riyadh" — repeatedly and with an increasingly weird, spitting emphasis.

Mark Wilson / Getty Images

5. Chief strategist Stephen Bannon could arrange for Gary Cohn, National Economic Council director, to "accidentally" be left behind in one of the countries.

Joshua Roberts / Reuters

6. Michael Flynn could be discovered attempting to stow away in a luggage bin on Air Force One.

Carlos Barria / Reuters

7. Trump could ask Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu for hair-care advice.

Abir Sultan / AFP / Getty Images, Ronen Zvulun / Reuters

These pictures were taken DAYS apart.

8. Trump could weigh in on the Great Hummus War while in Israel.

(Please do not fight over this in the comments.)
Cindy Ord / Getty Images

(Please do not fight over this in the comments.)

9. Press secretary Sean Spicer could get lost ~among~ the bushes in the Vatican's gardens.

Gregorio Borgia / AP

10. Chief of Staff Reince Priebus could have someone discover the anagram that is his True Name, causing him to disappear forever mid-trip.

It would probably be Angela Merkel who figured it out.
Win Mcnamee / Getty Images

It would probably be Angela Merkel who figured it out.

11. A Vatican official could mistakenly attempt to exorcize Stephen Miller, believing him to be a malignant ghost.

Win Mcnamee / Getty Images

12. Jared Kushner could play Nelly's "Air Force Ones" on Air Force One's speaker system — only to get it stuck on repeat for the entire flight.

View this video on YouTube

youtube.com

13. NATO could rename itself the "Not America Treaty Organization."

Yves Herman / Reuters

14. First daughter-slash-adviser to the president Ivanka Trump could spend the entire time in Brussels telling people that she speaks Belgian.

(They speak Flemish and French in Belgium. That is the joke.)
Olivier Douliery / AFP / Getty Images

(They speak Flemish and French in Belgium. That is the joke.)

15. Trump could lose a heated game of flip cup at the G-7 to new bros French President Emmanuel Macron and Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau.

Stephane De Sakutin / AFP / Getty Images, / Reuters

16. H.R. McMaster, Trump's national security adviser, could become so frustrated he crushes his glasses into powder with his bare hands.

Alex Wong / Getty Images

17. Melissa McCarthy could secretly replace Sean Spicer for three days before anyone notices.

NBCUniversal

18. Trump could ask for "real pizza" while in Italy for the G-7 meeting.

Pizza Hut

19. Trump could end the trip by telling the rest of the G-7 in front of the press that he swears he'll actually remember their names next time.

He won't.
Mandel Ngan / AFP / Getty Images

He won't.

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