If there's one thing we know about Amy Schumer, it's that she's never afraid of being completely honest.
And since she welcomed her first child, Gene, in May 2019, Amy has continued to be candid about her new life as a mom. Whether she's sharing photos of her C-section scar, or getting real about postpartum sex, she never holds back.
Well, the comedian and actor has now opened up about parenting, revealing during an appearance on Late Night With Seth Meyers that she finds motherhood challenging and believes all of her instincts so far have been "dead wrong."
When asked whether she believes she's a good mom, Amy responded: "Actually, no. It's interesting. You don't know how good of a parent you're going to be."
"I got some nice advice from Natalie Portman," she went on. "She was like, 'You have more instincts than you know you have.' And what I'm finding is that Natalie Portman is a huge liar. Because, so far, my instincts are all dead wrong."
"I've been reading this parenting book about how toddlers thrive, and all my instincts are wrong," she continued. "Usually, if [husband] Chris and I are gonna leave Gene with the nanny, we sneak out. We literally creep like a cartoon so he doesn't cry and freak out."
"Page one of this book is literally like, 'Whatever you do, don't sneak out. That's really bad for your child,'" she added. "Not to mention that we did name him, by accident, 'Genital.'"
For anyone unaware of that particular blunder, Amy announced back in August last year that she and Chris were changing their son's name from Gene Attell to Gene David after "some troll on the internet" pointed out that his original moniker sounded like "genital."
"[We realized] like a month in," Amy told Howard Stern. "You know, you're like, the new parents, and you're just tired and in ecstasy. I don't know if some troll on the internet... I read it, and I was like, 'Oh my god.' Me, a filthy person, it never dawned on me. All the blood rushed to my head."
"I call my friends from home for advice," Amy continued. "But my instincts are all really bad. They're really poor. But you have to live and learn."
"At first it's like, we'd be at the playground and he'd have a meltdown," she added. "I just wish ghost of Christmas future mom me had told ghost of Christmas past me that, 'You know how he's freaking out in the playgound? Well, he's gonna do this so often that you'll become desensitized and you won't be able to feel it anymore — that's something you can look forward to.'"