Chinese Couple Convert Kids Into Cash

Real life. Now more horrifying than The Onion. You know, I sometimes threaten to sell my kids to the circus if they're bad, but that's the crux. It's a threat. Get it together people!

Internet cafes are big business in China. So it's no surprise that Li Lin and Li Juan met over their shared addiction in 2007, according to Sanxiang City News. After a whirlwind courtship, they moved in together and started popping out free money children.

By 2011 the couple, both under 21, had welcomed two boys and a girl into their lives. Girls are pretty worthless in China, and these extra mouths were really cutting into their game time, so they sold her. For approximately $500. To whom or for what purpose I leave up to your imagination.

However, Internet Cafes are expensive and these pillars of parenthood blew through that cash pretty fast. Since it worked so well the first time, these entrepreneurs proceeded to sell BOTH of their male children. Boys are apparently worth $4600 a piece.

Li Lin and Li Juan would have probably continued the trend of procreating for pay if Li Lin's mother hadn't started poking around trying to figure out where her grandchildren had gotten off to.

When confronted about their atrocious acts, the parents claimed they didn't know selling humans was illegal and showed no remorse, claiming, "We don't want to raise them, we just want to sell them for some money."

O_O

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