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If This Isn’t A Hoverboard, Then What Is It?

Okay, internet. Got a better name?

Posted on August 28, 2015, at 5:31 p.m. ET

Everyone knows this thing is called a hoverboard:

IO Hawk

But when I wrote about it yesterday, some people got mad:

I don't see how you can call it a hoverboard if it doesn't, you know... hover https://t.co/UXlvmXhRk5

Newbs.

Anyway, in the interest of fairness, here's a poll that will determine the true name of the contraption. Vote away and be proud of yourself for participating in democracy.

  1. It's not a hoverboard, it's a:

Oops. Something went wrong. Please try again later
Looks like we are having a problem on the server.
It's not a hoverboard, it's a:
  1.  
    vote votes
    Hands Free Segway
  2.  
    vote votes
    Brocart
  3.  
    vote votes
    Doesn’t-Hoverboard
  4.  
    vote votes
    Virgin Mobile
  5.  
    vote votes
    HeadInjury5000
  6.  
    vote votes
    Doctor's Christmas Bonus
  7.  
    vote votes
    "WHEEEEEEEEEEEE!"
  8.  
    vote votes
    Heels On Wheels
  9.  
    vote votes
    Lazyboard
  10.  
    vote votes
    Pedestriaint
  11.  
    vote votes
    Head-Trauminator
  12.  
    vote votes
    Nerdmover
  13.  
    vote votes
    Frat Wagon
  14.  
    vote votes
    DoucheScoot
  15.  
    vote votes
    ArghMyFace
  16.  
    vote votes
    Scheissewagen (that’s german, btw)
  17.  
    vote votes
    FV420 Armoured Asshole Carrier
  18.  
    vote votes
    Biebermachine
  19.  
    vote votes
    Tailbone Fracture
  20.  
    vote votes
    Mobile Digital Platform
  21.  
    vote votes
    No, it's actually a hoverboard

Happy hovering

A BuzzFeed News investigation, in partnership with the International Consortium of Investigative Journalists, based on thousands of documents the government didn't want you to see.